rajee kushwaha
Member since 2010
I am a post- graduate in Defence Management from Chennai University (University Of Madras) and trained in Media Communication and Publicity at IIMC (I... More
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GRAND MA AND ME--LESSONS ON MORALITY!
by rajee kushwahainCoffeehouse
Posted on 20 Oct 2008
Have the times CHANGED or a MAJOR SHIFT has
taken place in the Indian Social system? I do not know;
I can not say. May be the readers would be able to
distinguish between the SHIFT and the CHANGE. While
sitting with a friend the other day, I witnessed an
unpleasant and ugly scene. It so happened that the
grand child of my friend had been playing loud music
despite repeated requests by my friend to stop it as
the guests were there in the house. The father of the
child was also there. When this boy did not stop, my
friend got up and switched off the music system.
taken place in the Indian Social system? I do not know;
I can not say. May be the readers would be able to
distinguish between the SHIFT and the CHANGE. While
sitting with a friend the other day, I witnessed an
unpleasant and ugly scene. It so happened that the
grand child of my friend had been playing loud music
despite repeated requests by my friend to stop it as
the guests were there in the house. The father of the
child was also there. When this boy did not stop, my
friend got up and switched off the music system.
The boy instantly shouted, “You old Bastard! You f*****---"
My friend got embarrassed and he gave one tight slap to the
boy. The boy started crying. His mother had seen this. And
she---a college lecturer in English---lost her temper on her
husband and my friend. She was not bothered that I was
sitting there. The worst came when his son too made the
passing remark, “Papa, she is right you are not a child, you
should have controlled yourself”. I was stunned and decided
to leave. I asked myself, “IS THIS THE SHAPE OF THE THINGS
TO COME? Instead of teaching right things to a child are we
going to pamper them and spoil?” Don’t we say CIVILITIES
ARE LEARNT AT HOME?
Then, I thought of my own childhood and my days with my
grand ma. My parents dare not say anything to her if she beat
me. She would even slap her grown up sons if they were found
lacking in moral conduct. I was her favourite grand child----she
had seventeen---nine boys and eight girls ---sired by her four
sons. Let me narrate an incident about myself.
Once my youngest UNCLE (FATHER’S YOUNGEST
BROTHER) came on leave and brought a box of apples.
My grandmother kept them in her lock and key. I used
to stay with her as my parents with their other siblings
were in Hyderabad. Therefore,I knew where she had kept
the keys and stole one or two apples. No one came to know.
This emboldened me. This became a regular practice with me
over the next two to three days. One day she got suspicious
on the reducing number of apples. She laid a trap and caught
me. I will never forget the spanking she gave me with a stick.
You see, whenever I had faltered she would break a branch
from the 'NEEM' tree in the campus of our old house and
spank me with this. Her method was unique. She would first
hit me once, then, hit herself twice and repeat the process,
shouting: -
My friend got embarrassed and he gave one tight slap to the
boy. The boy started crying. His mother had seen this. And
she---a college lecturer in English---lost her temper on her
husband and my friend. She was not bothered that I was
sitting there. The worst came when his son too made the
passing remark, “Papa, she is right you are not a child, you
should have controlled yourself”. I was stunned and decided
to leave. I asked myself, “IS THIS THE SHAPE OF THE THINGS
TO COME? Instead of teaching right things to a child are we
going to pamper them and spoil?” Don’t we say CIVILITIES
ARE LEARNT AT HOME?
Then, I thought of my own childhood and my days with my
grand ma. My parents dare not say anything to her if she beat
me. She would even slap her grown up sons if they were found
lacking in moral conduct. I was her favourite grand child----she
had seventeen---nine boys and eight girls ---sired by her four
sons. Let me narrate an incident about myself.
Once my youngest UNCLE (FATHER’S YOUNGEST
BROTHER) came on leave and brought a box of apples.
My grandmother kept them in her lock and key. I used
to stay with her as my parents with their other siblings
were in Hyderabad. Therefore,I knew where she had kept
the keys and stole one or two apples. No one came to know.
This emboldened me. This became a regular practice with me
over the next two to three days. One day she got suspicious
on the reducing number of apples. She laid a trap and caught
me. I will never forget the spanking she gave me with a stick.
You see, whenever I had faltered she would break a branch
from the 'NEEM' tree in the campus of our old house and
spank me with this. Her method was unique. She would first
hit me once, then, hit herself twice and repeat the process,
shouting: -
SAY: -JHOOT BOLNA PAAP HAI
(TELLING LIES IS A SIN).
(TELLING LIES IS A SIN).
SAY: -CHORI KARNA PAAP HAI
(STEALING IS IMMORAL).
SAY: -BADON KI IZZAT KARO
(RESPECT YOUR ELDERS).
(RESPECT YOUR ELDERS).
REMEMBER: -BADA INSAAN WO HI HOTA HAI JO BADE
KAAM KARTA HAI. UMAR SE KOI BADA NAHIN HOTA.
(A MAN IS GREAT BY HIS GREAT DEEDS.
AGE AND SENIORITY DO NOT MAKE HIM GREAT)
While spanking me and hitting herself she would cry very
loudly. Perhaps, she used to punish herself for having failed
to instill in me some good morals. I, today, feel she
probably thought she was equally to be blamed for my
“STEALING” adventures. What a noble way of accepting
MORAL RESPONSIBILITY? She was really a great lady of
strong courage of CONVICTIONS.
Many more such things she had often told me as a
young child. I can write a book on her philosophical and
moral discourses. But, then I always resented her big
moralizing sessions. I never could, then, understand the
meaning of those high sounding words but they were
stuffed into me by her. As I went along in life, they
checked me from my temptations of the easy ways.
Their impact had been too strong in my life. At times,
even if I was tempted to go astray, the old lady would
get to know this and she would haunt me in my
sub-conscious-mental debates to avoid nourishing
such a desire. Shewould pounce on me with her
“NEEM” stick in my dreams. I don’t know but I do
feel MORE I RAN AWAY FROM HER TEACHINGS IN
LIFE, MORE STRONGLY THEY CAME BACK AT ME.
IS IT THAT THE LESSONS LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD
HAVE A GREATER IMPACT ON A HUMAN BEING?
I don’t know; I can’t say—because I’M THEIR PRISONER.
Even today, they lie somewhere at the back of my mind.
And she lives in me through my memories. BUT I DO
KNOW THEIR MEANING AND IMPORTANCE TODAY.
I KNOW IT IS TOO LATE—FOR, SHE IS NOT AROUND.
Now I can only shout across the skies to tell her.
I WONDER IF the incident at my friend’s place was a
glimpse of the CHANGE or a DRIFT in the social system!
Could my mother say the same things to you GRAND MA?
I doubt she could dare to say this, for 1957 can not be 2008.
I believe YURI GAGRIN --a RUSSIAN had gone into the
space that year in 1957. My teacher had told me that it was
a big stride by mankind. I did not know what he meant?
FIFTY ONE years have gone by since. The world has
changed many times over. We had hardly known the world
around us, then. We have, now, discovered EARTH-II, Is it
a SHIFT TO AN ERA UNKNOWN TO THE MAN, GRAND MA?
KAAM KARTA HAI. UMAR SE KOI BADA NAHIN HOTA.
(A MAN IS GREAT BY HIS GREAT DEEDS.
AGE AND SENIORITY DO NOT MAKE HIM GREAT)
While spanking me and hitting herself she would cry very
loudly. Perhaps, she used to punish herself for having failed
to instill in me some good morals. I, today, feel she
probably thought she was equally to be blamed for my
“STEALING” adventures. What a noble way of accepting
MORAL RESPONSIBILITY? She was really a great lady of
strong courage of CONVICTIONS.
Many more such things she had often told me as a
young child. I can write a book on her philosophical and
moral discourses. But, then I always resented her big
moralizing sessions. I never could, then, understand the
meaning of those high sounding words but they were
stuffed into me by her. As I went along in life, they
checked me from my temptations of the easy ways.
Their impact had been too strong in my life. At times,
even if I was tempted to go astray, the old lady would
get to know this and she would haunt me in my
sub-conscious-mental debates to avoid nourishing
such a desire. Shewould pounce on me with her
“NEEM” stick in my dreams. I don’t know but I do
feel MORE I RAN AWAY FROM HER TEACHINGS IN
LIFE, MORE STRONGLY THEY CAME BACK AT ME.
IS IT THAT THE LESSONS LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD
HAVE A GREATER IMPACT ON A HUMAN BEING?
I don’t know; I can’t say—because I’M THEIR PRISONER.
Even today, they lie somewhere at the back of my mind.
And she lives in me through my memories. BUT I DO
KNOW THEIR MEANING AND IMPORTANCE TODAY.
I KNOW IT IS TOO LATE—FOR, SHE IS NOT AROUND.
Now I can only shout across the skies to tell her.
I WONDER IF the incident at my friend’s place was a
glimpse of the CHANGE or a DRIFT in the social system!
Could my mother say the same things to you GRAND MA?
I doubt she could dare to say this, for 1957 can not be 2008.
I believe YURI GAGRIN --a RUSSIAN had gone into the
space that year in 1957. My teacher had told me that it was
a big stride by mankind. I did not know what he meant?
FIFTY ONE years have gone by since. The world has
changed many times over. We had hardly known the world
around us, then. We have, now, discovered EARTH-II, Is it
a SHIFT TO AN ERA UNKNOWN TO THE MAN, GRAND MA?
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